Inside The Mind Of A Killer: Violent Fantasies And MORE Exposed In Released Manifesto Of Nashville School Shooter

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In the weeks leading up to her gruesome attack on the Covenant School in Nashville last year, Audrey Hale, a transgender killer, penned her thoughts about her 'imaginary penis' and her desperate desire for puberty blockers.

The Tennessee Star has recently obtained approximately four dozen pages of Hale's writings, which provide a chilling insight into her female-to-male transition and the motivations behind her deadly assault on the elementary school in March 2023, which resulted in the deaths of six individuals.

According to the Daily Mail, Hale's writings, often referred to as her 'manifesto,' reveal her resentment towards her parents, her disdain for her conservative Christian upbringing, and her anguish over the unavailability of hormone blockers during her childhood. The release of these writings has sparked controversy, with critics accusing officials of concealing them due to potential harm to the trans community.

The 28-year-old artist, who identified as a male named Aiden, penned her thoughts under the title 'My Imaginary Penis,' accompanied by a crude drawing. "My penis exists in my head. I swear to god I'm a male," Hale wrote in the documents, which were later recovered by the police. She expressed her longing to possess a penis, which would allow her to engage in sexual relations with a woman, in her assumed identity as Aiden.

Hale's writings also reveal her struggle with her conservative upbringing, describing her childhood as a girl as 'torture.' She feared being labeled a 'dyke or a f*****' by her high school peers. However, her life took a turn when she discovered transgenderism in her early 20s. "I finally found the answer that changing one's gender is possible," Hale wrote. But her mother's conservative beliefs and unfamiliarity with the LGBTQ community, particularly transgender individuals, posed a significant obstacle.

Hale's writings also contain violent language regarding the advent of puberty blockers in the 2010s, which were celebrated for helping transgender pre-teens safely delay puberty. "I'd kill to have those resources," Hale wrote, expressing her frustration that these treatments were not available when she was in the 6th grade and had already begun puberty.

The writings also reveal Hale's fantasies about having sex as a man, using her stuffed animals to create scenes. She referred to her 'stuffed boy doll' Tony as a representation of her male self. She would simulate intercourse between Tony and another soft toy for hours, even photographing the scene and losing track of time.

These entries were written just 16 days before Hale, dressed in combat gear and armed with two assault-type guns and a handgun, launched her deadly attack on the Covenant School. Her writings also contain politically charged comments about the rights of gun owners and trans individuals. "So now in America, it makes one a criminal to have a gun or, be transgender, or non-binary," Hale wrote, expressing her disdain for politicians.

The writings were recovered from Hale's car, which she left outside the school, and were provided to the Star by a source close to the investigation. However, both city police and the FBI initially argued that the material should not be released as it could jeopardize the investigations. This led to a lawsuit by the Star and others, seeking to compel the Metro Nashville Police Department (MNPD) and the FBI to release Hale's writings.

The families of Hale's victims subsequently joined the public records lawsuit against the city, claiming that the killer's estate includes the manifesto and that they therefore own the copyright and can determine whether or not to release it. The manifesto is expected to reveal more detail about the killer's motive.

In November, three pages of notes written by Hale ahead of the shooting were leaked. These notes revealed Hale's plan to target 'white privileged cr***ers' and 'f****ts,' before turning the gun on herself. On the day of the attack, Hale wrote: "Today is the day. The day has finally come. I can't believe it's here. Don't know how I was able to get this far but here I am. I'm ready ... I hope my victims aren't."

The timeline of the attack, as reported by the Daily Mail, reveals that Hale left her parents' property with a red bag at 9:30 am. She arrived at the Covenant School at 9:53 am and sent a goodbye message on Instagram to Averianna Patton at 9:57 am. At 10:10 am, Hale shot through the glass doors of the school to gain entry. The first shots-fired call to 911 was made at 10:13 am. The first Metro Police officers arrived on the scene at 10:24 am, and Hale was shot dead at 10:25 am, 14 minutes after she began shooting.

The aftermath of the shooting saw seven Nashville police officers suspended following a probe into how the notes became public. The incident has raised questions about the rights of gun owners and trans individuals, the availability of puberty blockers, and the handling of sensitive information by law enforcement agencies. As the debate continues, the writings of Audrey Hale serve as a chilling reminder of the tragic events that unfolded at the Covenant School in Nashville.