Comedy Central host Jon Stewart used his Monday night program to lampoon both the newly released Jeffrey Epstein documents and his own unexpected appearance in them, turning a potentially damaging revelation into a preemptive punchline.
According to Mediaite, Stewart opened the show by ridiculing the roster of public figures named in the latest batch of Epstein-related records, describing them as a veritable whos who of who you imagine wanted someone to touch their hoohoo. He then rattled off a list of high-profile names, adding: allegedly [Howard] Lutnik, [Steve] Bannon, [Elon] Musk, [Larry] Summers, [Bill] Gates, [Bill] Clinton, [Steve] Tisch, Melania [Trump], the guy who directed [Brett Ratner], Prince Andrew, and Sir Richard Branson.
Stewart quickly turned his attention to the President, delivering the kind of barbed monologue that has long endeared him to liberal audiences while reinforcing the medias obsession with President Trump. Rounding on the President, he added: And, of course, the star of our show, Donald Josephine Trump, whose thousands of mentions render Trump as kind of a necessary backdrop through the entirety of the Epstein Files.
He then reached for a cultural analogy that underscored how deeply Trumps name is woven into the documents. Kind of like New York City in a Woody Allen movie, which coincidentally is appropos, because hes also in the files! the host joked, referencing Allens 2020 memoir.
Having mocked others, Stewart abruptly pivoted to himself, signaling that he, too, had been swept into the Epstein orbit, at least on paper. With a nervous laugh, he warned the audience that he had a confession: Of course, to get ahead of the story, I am also in the files.
He then acknowledged the obvious reaction many public figures likely had as the documents went public. We all searched our names, right? he jokingly laughed.
The reality behind his inclusion, however, was far more mundane than the fevered speculation that often surrounds Epsteins network. Stewarts name appears only in a 2015 email exchange between Epstein and Hollywood producer Barry Josephson about a potential stand-up project for Woody, whom Stewart inferred to be Woody Allen.
I take you to the scene: It is midnight, Aug. 29, 2015, Stewart said, heightening the drama for comic effect. Jeffrey Epstein lies wide awake, his mind turning with ideas.
The email proposed that Allen develop a new stand-up routine for a streaming platform, with Josephson suggesting a biographical angle to frame the project. His pitch floated a possible host: Somebody like Jon Stewart could host/narrate the biographical part.
That casual phrasing was enough to spark Stewarts mock indignation, as he seized on the slight to his professional stature. Excuse me? I am offended! he declared.
He pressed the bit further, turning a single line in an email into a running gag about Hollywoods habit of hedging its offers. Somebody like Jon Stewart, or Jon Stewart?! My point is, do I have the offer or is this an audition? he exclaimed, underscoring how even a tangential mention in the Epstein files can be spun into late-night fodder rather than serious scrutiny.
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