Former first lady Michelle Obama has once again used a high-profile media appearance to air grievances about her marriage, motherhood and life of privilege, offering a revealing glimpse into the worldview of the modern progressive elite.
Appearing on Alex Coopers Call Her Daddy podcast Wednesday, Obama joined a show that proudly brands itself as the most-listened to podcast by women, but is more widely recognized for its graphic, often vulgar discussions of sex; failed Democratic presidential candidate Kamala Harris also chose the same venue during her 2024 campaign, according to the Daily Caller.
Cooper opened the conversation by floating the idea of taking the interview in that direction, telling Obama, So, when I was preparing for this interview I realized that there were kind of two ways I could go about it. Option one would be more OG Call her Daddy days. You know, talk some relationships. Try to ask you a couple questions about sex.
Obama responded with a quip that managed to drag her husband into the spectacle, joking, Just what Barack Obama wants to get reports on. Its like, You said what? While she ultimately declined to offer intimate details about her bedroom, she still found other ways to demean her spouse and diminish the traditional family roles that many Americans hold dear.
At one point, Obama described her luxury ski habits in a way that raised eyebrows, particularly among those who still take marriage vows seriously. She explained that she typically skis with an instructor. I ski in Aspen. Vance is my ski husband and I miss him dearly Ive skied with Vance for 10 years and I hope he hears this. I love him. I miss him.
The casual reference to a ski husband a term that echoes the increasingly common work husband or work wife trope underscored a cultural trend that treats marital exclusivity as a punchline rather than a promise. For many Americans, such language sounds less like harmless banter and more like a subtle form of disrespect toward ones actual spouse.
Obama then pivoted to one of her favorite themes: her rsum and elite credentials, which she suggested were ignored once she became first lady. [P]eople would be like, Well, how do you know what to do in this role? And to me, it was clear that, oh my god, you dont know anything about what I did before I came here But I was like, well, I went to Princeton and Harvard, she said. I mean, I practiced law. I was an assistant to the mayor in Chicago. I ran a nonprofit, a 501(c)(3) I was a vice president for community relations at the University of Chicago Hospitals. I was a dean of students.
She lamented that [a]ll of that just disappeared in the course of this whole election, and you now see me as just Barack Obamas wife That quickly my shoes become the most important thing about me. The complaint fits a familiar pattern among progressive elites who, despite enjoying extraordinary privilege and influence, insist they are chronically misunderstood and underappreciated.
Her comments also reinforced a stereotype many Americans have come to recognize about Ivy League graduates: they rarely miss an opportunity to remind everyone where they went to school. The insistence on foregrounding elite credentials, much like the way some activists constantly announce their dietary or lifestyle choices, can come across as more self-congratulatory than substantive.
Obama has a long history of publicly airing marital grievances, and she revisited that territory again by referencing earlier remarks about her husband. People think Im being catty by saying this its like, there were 10 years where I couldnt stand my husband, she revealed in December 2022. And guess when it happened? When those kids were little.
Rather than using that experience to affirm the value of perseverance, sacrifice and commitment in marriage, Obama has repeatedly framed those years as a kind of personal burden. The effect is to normalize contempt and resentment within marriage, rather than highlighting the stability and mutual responsibility that conservatives view as essential to family life.
Her commentary on motherhood and career choices was even more pointed, sending a clear message to young women that prioritizing children over professional advancement is a mistake. Lets be more honest about the struggle I am constantly telling young mothers its coming. You dont have to get off your career track. And I dont even recommend it, the former first lady said. Because kids grow up fast. And then theyre gone. Youve sacrificed everything. And you know, when they leave, they leave. They close the door and act like you never sacrificed.
She continued in the same vein, describing children as essentially ungrateful and transactional. Theyre like, I remember you. I dont need you anymore, right? So, Im like, you better have saved something for yourself so that when that period comes and theyre ready to move on, and youre also not holding on longer, she said. Because now what am I going to do? I devoted everything to you. And now Ive got to fill my time. So I encourage people to hang in there and keep something for yourself throughout this process.
For millions of parents who see raising children as their highest calling rather than a regrettable detour, this framing sounds less like hard-earned wisdom and more like a self-report of deep resentment. Instead of honoring the countless mothers who willingly step back from careers to invest in their families, Obamas advice implicitly treats that sacrifice as a trap to be avoided.
Her sense of grievance extends even to life in the White House, which she has previously described in terms that many Americans especially those struggling to pay bills might find tone-deaf. She complained that it was dangerous and expensive to live in the White House, as many people dont know, casting the most powerful address in the world as a financial burden.
I mean, much is not covered, she continued. Youre paying for every food, every bit of food that you eat, you know, youre not paying for housing and the staff in it but everything, even travel, if youre not traveling with the president, if youre kids are coming on a Bright Star, which is the first ladys plane, we had to pay for their travel to be on the plane. Coming from a family that enjoyed a $400,000 presidential salary, unparalleled perks and, later, multimillion-dollar book and media deals, such complaints highlight a striking disconnect from the everyday realities of ordinary Americans.
Taken together, Obamas remarks paint a portrait of someone who has been given extraordinary blessings yet remains fixated on slights, sacrifices and perceived disrespect. There is room for a measure of human sympathy here Perpetual bitterness sounds like a miserable existence but her message to young women and families stands in sharp contrast to the conservative vision of gratitude, duty and the enduring value of marriage and motherhood.
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